That ‘lil Bundle of Joy

Even before she got married, Along always wanted a baby. She love kids so very much.

So when she happily married 4 years ago, all she looked forward to is to get pregnant. Trial after trial, numerous check-ups and treatments, still no avail.

She get frustrated at times, of course. But mak always told her, it’s God’s plan. She’s a weekend wife ever since she got married and still is. And that time brother in law is struggling w his current job. And their newly bought house is still in construction.

3 years has passed. Brother in law nail a better job. Along transferred to a new school, closer to their new home and the husband. And the next day after she finally moved all her things into the new home, she got the news that there’s something cooking inside.

SubhanaAllah. How amazing is that?

We could think of 1001 possible reason and causes but truth is, Allah just know when is the right time.

Trust Him. He’s planning the best for all His servant.


And to wake up to this lil munckin, totally worth everything!


Too sweet to be called Cekodok.



And to my dear Aadheen Ayra, welcome sayang. May you grow up w beautiful manners as beauty as how you looked.. and be as witty as Aishah r.a, as smart as Siti Khadijah and as brave as Sumaiyah..


Kerana Dia Tahu

Among the ayat that could really lift me up whenever I’m down and sad, it will definitely be this;

“..Boleh jadi kamu membenci sesuatu, padahal ia amat baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi pula kamu menyukai sesuatu, padahal ia amat buruk bagimu; Allah mengetahui, sedangkan kamu tidak mengetahui.”
(Al-Baqarah: 216)

There are moments when your heart wants something so badly and you just couldn’t understand why it is not yours or can’t be yours, just remember, Allah knows.

Just remember that the purpose of life is to gain His bless and to plant as many so we can harvest in the hereafter.

Just remember that Allah is the Master Planner. He’s the all knowing. And he’s arranging our life in the most beautiful way that we can think of.

All we need to do is, be His servant.

And actually act like one.

We may slip. But remember;

No matter how great our sin is, Allah’s mercy is much greater.


Just remember that He knows.. And we don’t.. So have faith Fadilah. Have faith.

Don’t Despair

All praise to Allah.

Alhamdulillah. Was given a chance to attend a forum by 3 amazing speakers, Imam Muda Ashraf, Ustaz Syed Mohd Nor Hisyam and Syam Kamikaze.

Apart from being Ustaz¬†Syed¬†no. 1 #fangirl¬†(Heheee)¬†the whole forum was awesome! The topic is about Suci¬†Dalam¬†Debu. It’s very interesting. It’s about what we face everyday, what we struggle everyday. It’s about how we sin and how we should always come back to Allah, again and again.

So I thought, let’s share!


The forum starts with Ustaz Syed describing 3 stages of situation that we should aware of as a human in living our daily life. There are:

  1. We don’t feel guilty whenever we sin.
  2. We’re proud of our sin.
  3. We encourage people or so-called asking people to commit such sin (Nauzubillah!)

We’re just human. We sin every single day. We just can’t avoid it. It happens. But what makes the difference is what we feel towards the sin and our action upon it. Do we ask forgiveness and feel regret or we just continue living and act like everything is in order?

Which will bring us to the first type of people. We don’t feel guilty anymore. And the dangerous part is, without we realizing it could gradually lead us to the 2nd category and worst the 3rd category.

The topic just remind me of this video of Brother Nouman¬†Ali Khan of the shaitan¬†trick towards us every time¬†we sin. Shaitan will make us lose hope, and run away from Allah. Where what we should do actually is the more we sin, the more we approach Allah s.w.t asking for His forgiveness. We should never despair Allah’s mercy.



There’s this one hadith that I found in Solusi magazine about Allah’s mercy.

Daripada¬†Abu Sa’id¬†al-Khudri¬†bahawa¬†ia mendengar¬†Rasulullah¬†s.a.w bersabda yang bermaksud¬†: “Iblis berkata¬†kepada¬†Tuhannya: ‘Demi¬†keperkasaan-Mu, aku¬†akan¬†selalu¬†menyesatkan¬†anak¬†keturunan¬†Adam selama¬†roh¬†masih¬†berada¬†dalam¬†jasad¬†mereka.’ Allah s.w.t menjawab: ‘Demi¬†keperkasaan-Ku¬†dan keagungan-Ku, Aku¬†akan¬†selalu¬†mengampuni¬†mereka¬†selagi¬†mana mereka¬†meminta¬†keampunan¬†daripada-Ku” (Riwayat Ahmad)


Come one people, how sweet is that?

It’s the Master of universe saying that no matter how screw up we are, He will forgive us. As long as we’re sincere and really put on 100% effort to improve ourself. Allah understand our struggles. Talk to Him.

And also. What attract me during the forum is when Sham shared his experience and say that how we should always be careful of what we do in this life because sometime tanpa kita sedar, kita dah menggalak kan orang supaya membuat maksiat.

I mean yeah it’s not going to be like ‘Ehhh¬†jum¬†lah ikut¬†aku¬†pergi¬†buat¬†maksiat’ @_@. No, of course not. Sakit¬†otak¬†pun takkan¬†cakap¬†macam¬†tu. But sometimes its our action that make people commit such sin. In his case, the example that he gave is how he saw with his own eyes people not performing prayer for the sake of attending the concert where he’s the music director. You get what I mean. So yeah, kadang-kadang¬†kita¬†terlepas¬†pandang. That’s why in this life we can’t just walk blantly. That’s why Allah provide us with the ultimate GPS, Al-Quran and Sunnah and one amazing role model, Rasulullah¬†s.a.w.. Nak¬†pergi¬†kenduri¬†kawin¬†pun ada peta. What makes we think we can lead our life without any navigation?

So the point is, and basically what they conclude is, yes we sin everyday. Setiap¬†hari¬†hati¬†kita¬†akan¬†berdebu. But never let the dust turn into something that permenantly¬†dirt our heart.. Just…come back to Allah and never lose hope. And try to improve our self, every single day. Biar¬†sikit, biar¬†kecil¬†langkah¬†nya¬†tapi¬†kita¬†bergerak. Istiqamah, stay strong and hang on. It”s not going to be easy but remember, Allah is there to help. Allah is always there.

Hidayah itu milik Allah tapi kita sebagai hamba perlu sentiasa berharap dan berdoa supaya kita tergolong dengan orang-orang yang Allah sentiasa berikan hidayah..

I;m sorry if all those that I write a bit jumble up. I’m just trying to share what I learned tonight because Allah knows how the forum has benefits me. May Allah bless every soul that worked on the programme..

and may Allah bless us, forgives us and always have mercy on us, insyaAllah.



Bangkok : Pictorial

Now is the time, dear sisters. :)


I had a conversation with a friend sometime ago on the husband criteria thingy.

I told him, all I want for a husband is someone who can always guide me to the straight path. Who will alert me whenever I put on tighter cloth than usual. When that particular day my hijab is shorter. When I started to delay my prayer. You get the picture. Someone who will always be there to make sure your path is right and straight.

Then he said something that hit me straight to my face.

Why wait for the husband? Why can’t you do it all by yourself?

That, just makes me go ‘ya hooorrrr’

I know you girls get the picture. Not that we¬†can’t do it ourselves. We can¬†insyaAllah but it’s just wonderful to have someone who be there for us.¬†Attention seeker macam tu lah kan. ūüėõ

But yeah he have his point. It’s true. I’m talking here in the situation where:

Alah, dah kawin nanti buat lah.  Sebab tu I nak suami macam Ustaz Don. Supaya dia boleh didik iiiii

Yes allll of us want that kind of husband.

But why wait?

What if we get married and it turn out he’s not so Ustaz Don? So now what? What happen to our fairy tale waking up for tahajud w the hubby as the imam…and all that?

You see, lelaki dan wanita ada hak nya di dalam islam. Men just don’t try to be woman and vise versa. Just don’t. Tapi lelaki dan wanita juga ada persamaan nya.


In the eyes of Allah s.w.t. There’s no such thing as guys’ prayer reach Allah faster then the sisters’.

Allah has said this in Surah An-Nisa’ (4:124)

And  whoever  does  righteous  deeds,  whether  male  or  female,  while  being  a  believer  Рthose  will  enter  Paradise  and  will  not  be  wronged,  [even  as  much  as]  the  speck  on  a date  seed.

Also in Surah An-Nisa’ (4:32)

And  do  not  wish  for  that  by  which Allah has  made  some  of  you  exceed  others.  For  men is  a  share  of  what  they  have  earned,  and  for  women  is  a  share  of  what  they  have earned.  And  ask Allah of  his  bounty.  Indeed Allah is  ever,  of  all  things,  Knowing.

Yes we have our own right and limits but when it comes to the relationship with Allah, it’s the same.

What I’m saying is, we should work as hard in obtaining Allah’s love and mercy..

Islam teach us to be dependent only to Allah. Only to Allah. Don’t say we’re independent. We are just did not depend on the creature up to the extend we can’t walk by our self.¬†But we depend on Allah. Alone.

With that, insyaAllah, we will become much stronger and calmer.

I know it’s wonderful to see married couple that really lead their life based on the quran and sunnah. It’s just too sweet.¬†But to initiate that, is our self.

We are responsible of our own deed. Not our parents, not our spouse.

You see how beautiful islam is? It teach¬†us to be responsible. And seek nothing, but Allah’s bless.

Oh yes it’s not easy.

It is NOT easy. Really.

To change is not easy. It’s everyday battle. Every single day you have to whisper to yourself, to hang on, to stay focus, to keep the consistency, to not slip and fall out.

But that’s the beauty. The more we feel scared, the more we seek Allah.

So now before going out, instead of checking whether our outfit actually color coordinated or not, we will have a glance at the mirror and check, whether Allah will be please with I’m wearing right now in order to face the world.¬†We don’t need husband or any guy to tell you that. We can do it our self.

The point is, it have to start within our self.. Start slowly but keep going.. Oh well I’m actually saying this to my self. I know I slipped every single day but masyaAllah, setiap kali pun, Allah’s help is there. You just know it.

That’s why I said, it’s not easy but the battle is worth it.

Just remember 1 thing, Jannah.

Strive for Jannah.

Because the beauty in this world is nothing. Nothing compared to Jannah.

And ALSO remember, the most painful thing in this world is also nothing, compared to Jahannam, nauzubillah.


Just remember that and InsyaAllah, we will find the strength.


May Allah protect us, our family and our friends from the hellfire, may Allah keep all of us on the straight path, may Allah forgives our sin and may Allah put His mercy and love to us, insyaAllah.

Bangkok 101 (?)


No word could describe how grateful I am for the time, money, chances and energy granted by Allah s.w.t allowing me to spend few days at Bangkok w Mia.

It was such a great gateway. It’s not really the place. Yeah Bangkok is nice. But it’s the experience that counts.

It’s true what they say, it’s not where you are. It’s who you are with. Being there w Mia makes things much better. It’s good to go out and see things out side of the normal daily routine. Its good to go out and see other muslim’s struggle.

It’s really an eye opener. Every single thing that happen, it will just remind me of how fortunate and lucky that I’m born as a muslim. That, is just the biggest gift of all.

One thing that I have learn is how special Allah protect the woman. Why Allah ask us to guard our modesty, to put on hijab, to cover ups. That is all solely to protect the woman. SubhanaAllah. Walking on the street with all the strangers, almost clueless and at the place where woman are oppressed and manipulated, you have no idea how safe it feels walking and knowing that people know you’re a muslim woman. Some may see it as just a piece of cloth on the head but that what makes the difference.

The respect, the concerns that they have. MasyaAllah. Made me feels so special. Allah wants us to feel special. So let us at least our very best not to abuse it.. After all… Aurat itu hak Allah..

Never be ashamed of what God ask us to guard, to protect. Be proud of it. Be proud that we’re muslim woman. Be proud of what Allah ask us to do.

May His guidance are always w us, our friends and family. May we always stay strong in facing each battle in our daily lives. May He forgives our sin and always guard us so we’re always on His path, insyaAllah..